Therapist reflections: Greeting the dark
The past few weeks in the northeast, it's undeniable, the dark is creeping in. Cold fronts are sweeping through, the leaves are bursting with color, and it's time to dig out the sweaters and thick blankets.
Early fall from late August to early September has a brightness to it. A sense of starting fresh, like the first day of school. But once October hits, the feeling shifts. It softens. There's a certain melancholy nostalgia that settles in: both a mourning for the long, bright days and a simultaneous urge to curl inward, get cozy, and slow down.
I'll admit, this isn't my favorite time of year. I tend to greet November and December with a grimace, already doing the math until my favorite day: the winter solstice, when we start gaining daylight again. That's when I can literally feel my nervous system take a big, shaky exhale—"we made it."
I've learned to meet this season differently over the past few years. This is when self-care stops being optional and starts being survival, at least for me. I need to get outside when I can, move my body, go to reiki, and eat stuff that grows from the ground (not just whatever is easiest and fastest). When I start slipping on any of this, I feel it and it hits hard. And honestly? Some weeks I still do. But I'm getting better at catching it before I'm fully in the hole.
One thing I'm adding this year: a weekly YouTube video. I've been following Cecilia Blomdahl, who lives in Svalbard located between Norway and the North Pole. She experiences 2.5 to 3 months of complete darkness from mid-November to January. Watching her videos and seeing the way she welcomes the darkness with understanding, kindness, appreciation, and intentionhas been a template for how I want to approach this time of year. There's a kindred solidarity in it that feels both encouraging and relieving.
My relationship with this season will probably always be a little complicated. But I'm learning that small shifts and knowing I'm not alone in it can make it a bit easier to bear.
If this resonates, you're not alone.
This kind of seasonal shift can bring up old patterns—anxiety, burnout, the urge to white-knuckle your way through. If you're tired of just managing and ready for real, embodied change, I'd love to work with you.
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